They salute you. “Zulu” (1964)

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directed by Cy Endfield
© 1964 Paramount Pictures. All Rights Reserved.

Have you ever heard of the Anglo-Zulu War? Probably not many of you, so let me introduce you to the topic: as you may be guessing, it was a battle between the British Empire and Zulu Kingdom (monarchy in Southern Africa). The war took place in 1879 and perhaps you didn’t learn about it during your history lessons (I didn’t), but it was a real miracle that happened there. Because at some point, around 100 British soldiers had to fight with about 4,000 Zulu warriors. And I’m sorry to spoil that, but I guess it’s not a spoiler if it’s based on a real event – the British won. Somehow, they managed to hold off the huge group of Zulu people. And today’s film presents that very special battle. Honestly speaking, I’m not a fan of war films. It’s really difficult for me to enjoy them, except appreciating special effects, costumes and editing, but that’s it. However, there are few productions that really made me stare at the screen with curiosity and “Zulu” is one of them. Obviously, it’s a film from 1964, so don’t expect exciting effects which you can see in films today. Still, the narration and the way this story was directed are incredibly pleasant. I mean, people killing each other isn’t the nicest view, certainly, but despite having to present only one battle in over 2 hours, the director did a very good job and made a real performance out of it. Maybe it’s not a popular opinion, but it’s mine so I’ll share it – I felt like watching a theatre play. So if you’re not into war films, I recommend you to try “Zulu”. Perhaps it’ll be the first one you’ll enjoy for real. The fighting scenes are quite spectacular considering the year of production. And an interesting fact: you can see Mangosuthu Buthelezi playing the role of Zulu King in the film. In fact, Mangosuthu is the great-grandson of that Zulu King, Cetshwayo kaMpande. I think it’s a wonderful thing he got this role. Oh and you can also see young Michael Caine, so it’s like +10 to desire.

My rating: 7/10
S.

I’m not a prude, I’m just highly selective. “Clueless” (1995)

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directed by Amy Heckerling
© 1995 Paramount Pictures. All Rights Reserved.

So many people had told me about this film before I decided to finally watch it. Somehow it seemed ridiculous that people recommend me a film for teenagers, which looks way too sweet to stand in my age. Yet, even those who know my taste were recommending it. Alright, 2020, the world is ending, I’m gonna watch a teenage comedy. And you know what? I’m currently recommending it to you. And I don’t care how old you are, this film is such a good thing to see after a tiring day, I swear. The main character is Cher Horowitz (Alicia Silverstone), who’s the daughter of a very rich lawyer. The girl is everything you might have hated or wished to be in high school – she’s attractive, popular and wealthy. At some point she comes up with a crazy idea to make her two teachers fall in love with each other so they forget about their work for a moment and give Cher better grades. Besides that, she also wants to help this new student, Tai (Brittany Murphy), and together with another super rich friend Dionne (Stacey Dash) organise a total makeover for the girl. In the meantime, Cher’s ex-stepbrother (don’t ask) Josh (Paul Rudd) comes to stay with them during his break from college. The boy is totally different from Cher, but those two sort of get on with each other. And I don’t want to tell you more, because, honestly, the plot doesn’t really matter. I mean, if you’re a teenager, then perhaps yes, you’ll like the general story. But if you’re an adult and I somehow made you watch this comedy, then you’ll pay attention mostly to the dialogues, which are on point. Generally, the idea of the director was to make a film to laugh at teenagers. And it worked. Sorry teenagers. I absolutely love all those tiny allusions and double meanings from time to time. Besides, can someone explain me how Paul Rudd looks exactly the same in this film from 1995 as he does now, in 2020? 25 years of difference and he’s like copy-paste. No idea what he eats, drinks or takes, but I want the same thing.

My rating: 6/10
S.

Every human being is a puzzle of need. “Red Sparrow” (2018)

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directed by Francis Lawrence
© 2018 20th Century Fox. All Rights Reserved.

People on the Internet can be horrible, you know? Do you remember that moment when someone stole Jennifer Lawrence’s naked photos from her iCloud? If not, now you remember or you’ve just found out. It was a huge thing, everyone was writing about it and instead of criticising the hacker, most news services were criticising her. Why? I don’t know. She took photos of herself. Yes, without clothes she’s naked. Yes, she has a body. Yes, she’s like every woman on this planet. Why is it such a big deal for people? Especially, since she didn’t even publish them, it was just for her. Why am I writing about this? Because it was a very traumatising experience for Jennifer and she obviously felt embarrassed. I bet not because of her body, but because of the way people started perceiving her. However, in today’s film, she shows what everyone should have done in her situation – don’t give a damn and show them how gorgeous you are. In “Red Sparrow” she plays Dominika Egorova, a Russian ballet dancer, who gets badly injured and is no longer able to perform. The woman needs to find another job to take care of herself and also of her ill mother. Soon she gets recruited to “Sparrow School”, which is a special training place for women, who later become agents. However, instead of using guns, they use their own bodies as weapons. Which means, they often need to seduce certain people to get the needed information. So as you can see, this role must have been a huge challenge for Jennifer. The producers even promised that after shooting she would have an option to indicate the scenes that she’d prefer to be deleted, however, the actress did not ask for that at all. Instead, she’s proud of her performance and she said: “The insecurity and fear of being judged for getting nude, what I went through, should that dictate decisions I make for the rest of my life?” How not to love this woman? And even though “Red Sparrow” is a bit too long and slightly boring sometimes (although the film itself generally looks lovely), Jennifer did an amazing job and I think you should definitely see her. Her and her gorgeous body that she definitely shouldn’t be ashamed of.

My rating: 7/10
S.

We rob banks. “Bonnie and Clyde” (1967)

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directed by Arthur Penn
© 1967 Warner Bros.-Seven Arts. All Rights Reserved.

Today’s film is significant for Hollywood, or I should rather say its New Wave. As it’s sometimes called “The Hollywood Renaissance” was a movement from the mid-1960s to the early 1980s. During that time, a lot of new and young filmmakers started working in the US and the way of making films changed. It’s difficult to say which production started that New Wave, because I’m sure every film history specialist will tell you something else, but “Bonnie and Clyde” is for sure one of them. But what is the story really about? Even if you haven’t seen the film, I’m sure you’ve heard about Bonnie and Clyde somewhere. Well, Bonnie Parker and Clyde Barrow were real. They were a couple from the US who instead of going out and kissing in rain preferred robbing banks. You know, romance can be understood in many ways, no judgement. In the film you can see Warren Beatty playing Clyde and Faye Dunaway playing Bonnie. And I don’t see the point of telling you more about the plot, because they are literally just robbing places, so you’ll see that yourselves. However, I have some fun facts. First of all, I’m sure it won’t be a surprise if I say that the film is a bit far from the truth. I mean, maybe not far far, but definitely you shouldn’t trust everything you’ll see. I recommend you to read more about the couple after watching. Second of all, this film was very much controversial because it was way more sexual and violent than any previous productions. And my third fact for you is in my opinion the best and somehow connected to the second. Bonnie and Clyde were a couple, you got it, right? But there was an idea to make Clyde bisexual and present those two “having a lot of fun” with another man. Instead, in the film Clyde has very little sexiness and Bonnie steals the show completely, at least according to me. Would a threesome be a better idea? Who knows. But if the final version was seen as controversial back then, imagine how much attention a bisexual Clyde would have got. Anyway, I hope you’ll enjoy watching the film more knowing the would-be Clyde’s dirty little secrets. This classic didn’t amaze me too much, but I think it’s important to learn about the famous robbing couple and to know one of the most significant films in the history of American cinema.

My rating: 6/10
S.

Good or mediocre. “A Modern Man” (2017)

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directed by Eva Mulvad
© 2017 Danish Documentary. All Rights Reserved.

Some people say this documentary is horrible and unwatchable. Well, it is, if you can easily get jealous or if you’re absolutely not following what’s going on in the world. And I’m not saying that in a rude way. Sometimes I also try to cut myself off from the newest trends and the way current life looks like. I actually admire those who can. Anyway, today’s film is a documentary about Charlie Siem. He’s a Norwegian-English professional violinist, who also works as a model. Yes, ladies, I know, it sounds marvellous. However, this production isn’t really about him as an individual. At least not for me. Charlie is a representative of modern men. Who are they? Well, those are men who are successful in life, who follow their paths despite certain stereotypes, who feel good being on their own (or at least they say so) and who try not to bond with anyone too much. They really enjoy life and do whatever they feel like doing. Sounds amazing, right? It does, indeed, but if you decide to see this film, you may feel what I felt and it’s definitely not jealousy. I felt pity. Of course, I’d love to play the violin like Charlie, I’d love to have a lot of money and travel the world. But I wouldn’t like to feel empty inside, and this is how I perceive him. Perhaps I’m wrong, but this is just my opinion and the way I see this man. And if he’s a representative of modern men, that’s even sadder. So if you decide to watch the film, try to look a bit deeper and not focus only on his life in glitter and sequins. Because I think that somewhere underneath there’s a human missing a lot. Yet, he’s a fantastic musician, so it’s very pleasant to listen to him playing.

My rating: 6/10
S.

If you could choose a magical power, which one would you choose? “Magical Girl” (2014)

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directed by Carlos Vermut
© 2014 Avalon. All Rights Reserved.

There are those films that you have no idea how to explain to others. And “Magical Girl” is one of them. The description that you may find on the Internet says that it’s about a man who has a terminally ill daughter and he wants to make at least one of her dreams come true. One of the girl’s dreams is to have some extremely expensive Japanese dress that one of the characters of her beloved TV show is wearing. Unfortunately, the man (Luis Bermejo) is a literature teacher without a job, so finding money for such a gift seems impossible. Still, he really wants to make his little Alicia (Lucía Pollán) happy before… you know. And it’s true, this is how the film begins. But what happens next is an emotional rollercoaster with special effects from another planet, I swear. I mean, don’t expect a sci-fi production, that’s not what it is at all. Indeed, it’s a very difficult drama that later plays with your mind for the whole two hours. I needed to sit down and stare at an empty wall for some minutes after finishing it. If you think it’s just a sad boring drama about poor man trying to collect money for his dying child – wrong. At some point, you even forget about those two, because the story evolves and evolves into something spectacular and terrifying at the same time. This is not a good film to relax or cry hugging a pillow. It’s one of those stories that you think of for many days after seeing it. I don’t want to tell you too much, but it’s definitely a film worth watching. They say it’s drama/thriller, I say it’s an emotionally draining experience full of anxiety. And I loved it. So… enjoy!

My rating: 7/10
S.

It was like meeting my sister for the first time. “Molly” (1999)

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directed by John Duigan
© 1999 Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer. All Rights Reserved.

I feel like today’s film is slightly forgotten, even though it’s really adorable and thought-provoking. But it’s not one of those films that feel like another 2 hours at work solving everybody’s problems, not at all. It’s actually a comedy with a bit of drama, so if you want to see a rather relaxing yet not muddling production, this is perfect. As you might be guessing, the main character is Molly. Duh, not a very surprising title. Molly McKay (Elisabeth Shue) is a young woman with autism. Many years ago, when she was a little girl, her parents died in a car accident and ever since then she’s been living in an institution for people with certain difficulties. The film begins when Molly is 28 years old and her institution has to be closed due to financial problems. That is why her older brother Buck (Aaron Eckhart) needs to take care of her. Buck is not autistic, but being responsible for Molly won’t be that easy for him. He works as an advertising executive and is very much focused on his job, so having a sister who cannot be left alone even for a moment means he’ll have to make very difficult choices. This film is actually MGM’s first pancake, if you know what I mean. You probably don’t, so let me explain. When you make pancakes, the first one is always… “unsatisfactory”. Obviously, it wasn’t MGM’s first film ever, but they did with it exactly the same as we all would do with the first pancake – eat it fast and not let our guests even see this little creature. “Molly” had a very poor marketing and it was in cinemas only for one weekend. And a lot of critics say it’s cheesy, that it’s not surprising at all, that it’s cliché etc. But let me tell you – it’s a simple story, yes, and I’m sure you’ve seen such many times, but it’s a very pleasant reminder to reflect on our life priorities and family bonds. Boom! Besides, I always appreciate productions about people with disabilities, because I believe more viewers should learn about them, even if the characters are sometimes horribly overacted. Here, Elisabeth Shue did a decent job, so I hope you’ll appreciate “Molly”, our little unloved pancake.

My rating: 6/10
S.

Do you get up each morning too? “Memories of Murder” (“Sarinui Chueok”, 2003)

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directed by Bong Joon-ho
© 2003 CJ Entertainment. All Rights Reserved.

I have a problem with Bong Joon-ho. I mean, I feel like he’s a visionary, full of very interesting ideas and he totally knows how to make a connection with the audience. But somehow, his films can be pretty annoying when it comes to the form. The same with “Parasite”. I loved the story, cinematography was on point, but generally I finished watching it with a frown on my face. With today’s film, it was different. I was rather frowning for the whole time and smiled at the end. But let me tell you a bit about the plot first. We follow Park Doo-man (Song Kang-ho), who’s a detective trying to solve a very difficult case. Recently, two women have been found raped and murdered. It’s quite hard for him to cooperate with the police because they seem to be incompetent, in his opinion. The man meets a boy with an intellectual disability, Baek Kwan-ho (Park No-shik), who becomes the main suspect. Soon, another detective arrives. Seo Tae-yoon (Kim Sang-kyung) is from Seoul and he has totally different working culture, so those two men aren’t getting on with each other that well. Especially since Seo is quite sure that the handicapped boy is not guilty. In spite of him being right or wrong, new victims appear and the killer keeps on playing his game. And as I said, I was confused by the whole story and the way it was presented. Or perhaps it’s because I’m not a fan of Korean way of filmmaking. For me it’s often too messy and emotionless, even though actors are overacting pretty often. But if you’re a fan of such cinema, don’t feel offended. It’s perhaps because I’m used to watching American and European productions and it’s just difficult for me to enjoy something that culturally different. Still, the ending was marvellous and, after reading some comments, I noticed that quite a lot of people misunderstood the director’s idea about it. So to sum up, it’s totally not my style, but I appreciate the hard work and I can understand why people love this production. And I promise not to give up on Korean cinema!

My rating: 7/10
S.

The best kind of prize is ‘sur’prize. “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory” (2005)

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directed by Tim Burton
© 2005 Warner Bros. Pictures. All Rights Reserved.

Since I told you about “Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory” (1971) yesterday, I guess it’s time to discuss the remake. There’s no point in telling you what the story is about, because you either know it or if not, you can read yesterday’s post, because it’s exactly the same. Today, I’d like to focus more on the fact that Burton’s version is really underrated, in my opinion. So the original film, as I said yesterday, was way too nice for me. Oh and be careful, because there will be many SPOILERS. So Willy Wonka is this strange guy living on his own in a big factory, which looks like a real heaven for children. He makes delicious sweets and children love him for that. However, when children visit him, he acts as if he didn’t care about them, then gets furious at the end (even though he seemed like a peaceful person for the whole tour) and finally he gives the factory to Charlie. A child. Do you see what I mean? For me the character of Wonka in the old film doesn’t make sense. Of course, it’s fantasy, but comparing to Wonka from Burton’s version, he’s horribly irrational. However, Burton’s Wonka is perfectly written, in my opinion. He’s lonely, living without his family, he hates people because everybody has let him down and he’s consistent as a character. Besides, at the end he proposes Charlie to live with him in the factory, but the boy chooses his family over this huge eatable playground. And that’s the moment when it hits Wonka and he grows as a character. I have to admit that I saw Burton’s version first, so don’t judge me. Yet, when I was watching Stuart’s version, I was so disappointed with the character of Wonka (not acting to be clear) and the ending. I think that Burton showed the real potential of this story, while Stuart made a cute adaptation for children. And I absolutely admire both filmmakers for working with this book, because I think it’s awesome and I’m sure a lot of viewers grew up watching Willy Wonka in the 70s. Still, I’m definitely more team Burton and I wished more people appreciated his version, despite the fact it’s a remake of an absolute classic. Besides, Johnny Depp is marvellous in this role. It’s probably one of his best. And let’s all clap our hands for David Kelly, who played Grandpa Joe. What an adorable man, I swear!

My rating: 9/10
S.

A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men. “Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory” (1971)

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directed by Mel Stuart
© 1971 Paramount Pictures. All Rights Reserved.

Never underestimate the power of children. Never! Do you know that today’s film wouldn’t exist if one ten-year-old girl hadn’t asked her father to make it? The director’s daughter read the book about Willy Wonka and liked it so much that she talked to her father about it and… voilà! I guess most of you know the story of Willy Wonka very well, but in case you don’t, let me shortly tell you what it’s about. The main character is actually Charlie Bucket (Peter Ostrum), a boy from a poor family. In his town, and also all over the world, children are crazy about sweets produced by mysterious Willy Wonka (Gene Wilder). His factory is known as the place where “nobody ever goes in, and nobody ever comes out”. One day, Willy informs that he hid 5 Golden Tickets in his chocolate bars and those who find them will be invited for a tour in the factory. Obviously, everybody’s crazy about finding one of the tickets, so is Charlie. However, he cannot afford buying that many chocolate bars since his family barely finds money for everyday food. But I guess it won’t be a surprise for you if I say that Charlie somehow gets the ticket (he’s the main character, duh) and goes to the factory with 4 other children. And what happens there is for you to see. Personally, I love this story and I’m totally thankful for Stuart’s daughter. Thanks to this little lady, we can now enjoy her father’s film and Tim Burton’s remake. I’m not going to lie to you, I definitely like Burton’s version more, because I find this story perfect for his style and I believe Stuart’s version is too… nice. Still, it’s a very well done production with amazing soundtrack. Even if you haven’t seen the film, I’m sure you know “The Candy Man” song, which was written for it and later covered by many artists. Besides, there’s one very significant element that is better in Stuart’s version – Oompa Loompas! I’m a huge fan of their choreography and costumes, and I liked them a bit more than the new Oompa Loompas. If you haven’t seen the film, you’re probably wondering what the hell I’m talking about. Good. Go and find out!

My rating: 7/10
S.